To me this brilliant white and muted grays and greens is a ten! To someone else it may be horrendous. We love to quantify. Everything seems to have a top ten list. Even the doctor wants to know your pain on a 1 to 10. I’m kind of a math and science guy but this bothers me sometimes!
This is a season of extremes. People are all over the board this time of year. The engagements are high but so is the suicide rate. People are brought closer and pushed away, memories hold particular significance. Memories are part of the joy and the sadness but they don’t go away, do they.
How do we quantify a memory? It would be the same to quantify love. Love has no bounds. It can happen any time any where to any one. Can you imagine…”So on a scale of 1-10 how much do you love me?” It’s preposterous.
Love and grief and memories are brilliant partners. They are interconnected calling on one another to sneak up on you. You can’t quantify that kind of pain. In my family we accept and recognize and acknowledge but it doesn’t stop us.
There is more love in our hearts. Look for it and give it freely. It is not quantifiable and boundless. A part of your existence is damaged but not all of it! If you have lost someone use their memory as a launching pad for giving. If you internalize your grief you are doomed to be depressed. Share the love you feel for your special person by giving. A simple smile and Merry Christmas to a store clerk, or a passerby. Hold a door, visit a shut in, be present.
There is a whole world of hate and grief, be a source of joy, be a point of light and love. The person you are grieving would be so proud!
Peace and joy!